I’ve always wanted two kids - one boy and one girl - okay, okay, there was a point when I wanted no kids, but that’s another story altogether.  Now that I have Gavin, I really hope that my next child will be a girl. 

Although there are a whole host of methods for pre-determining the sex of your child, some scientifically evidenced and some not, there is also a theory I recently heard regarding certain men being more likely to father male children and vice versa.

What’s the theory?

It’s almost like an off-shoot from Darwin’s theory, although I’ve only heard this through word of mouth so I don’t know if there’s any real evidence behind it.  Basically the theory is that some men are more likely to father male children because their genetic makeup is “better” for survival, therefore they are more likely to propagate male children who will continue to spread the “good genes”.  While men with “lesser genes” are more likely to breed female children to bear children, hence reducing the spread of the “bad genes”.

From a logical standpoint, there is some merit to this theory.  After this, I’m sure that the fathers of daughters will be up in arms, while the fathers of sons will be sitting smugly in their chairs as they read this.

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Recently, we took Gavin over to his godsister’s house where Gavin had a field day with her masak masak (read: cooking) toys and play kitchen.  Knowing that Daddy wouldn’t like this, I made an attempt to get Gavin away from the toy stove. I brought out some blocks and tried to get Gavin interested in building blocks instead. Sad to say that the blocks lost out to the masak masak set, the latter being clearly more interesting to Gavin.

“Not to worry,” said PL.  “He probably likes it because it’s new and he’s never seen it before.”

Well, we can only hope so…

But here’s the irony.  When Gavin was younger, hubby and I used to take him to the toy shop.  Whenever we came across a masak masak set or any toys related to household care (such as toy cooking sets, ironing boards, vacum cleaners, etc.) hubby would say, “Move along!  My son’s not playing with these toys!”

At home, Gavin loves the kitchen.  He loves to watch Ah Mah cook and he likes to “help” my SIL bake bread.  Since lots of children are fascinated by the kitchen because of all the activity in there, there’s really nothing to worry about, right?  Well, he also likes hairbands and bangles and pink stuff!  Okay, maybe he likes pink because the colour is bright - all kids love bright colours.  As for the hairbands, well, they’re interesting and so are the bangles.  He’ll grow out of it, won’t he?

The hubby reckons this is the result of me hoping too hard for a girl when I was pregnant with Gavin, although my BFF has another theory.  During my pregnancy, she mentioned a book or article (I can’t remember which) that she had read which said that mothers who had stressful pregnancies were more likely to deliver boys who are gay - at least I think that was the gist of it.  In the effort to preserve the peace, I shan’t extrapolate further, but there’s food for thought, wouldn’t you think?

Personally, though, I think if the hubby just relaxed and stopped worrying about his son liking girls’ stuff and girls’ colours, it will all eventually go away as Gavin grows older.  The more fuss made of it, the more Gavin will get curious as to why Daddy says, “no”, and the more he’s going to do the things Daddy doesn’t want him to do.

Already I can see a rather defiant streak coming out in my son.  For instance, when I ask him which pair of shoes he wants to wear and he won’t give me an answer, I’ll simply pick a pair.  As if he has to have the last say, Gavin will then indicate he wants to wear the other pair of shoes. 

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According to Chinese superstition, here’s another “method” of predicting the sex of the baby…

While we were preparing the “Tong Yuin” for the Chinese Spring Harvest Festival, my MIL told me that prior to delivering my hubby, she was also asked to make “Tong Yuin” (the stuff you see in the picture below). The process begins with mixing glutinous rice flour with water until it forms a paste. You can add dyes to the paste to create different colours, although usually for festive occasions, pink is the most favoured colour. The pregnant woman then has to shape the paste into little balls which are then scalded in a pot of boiling water.

Based on the superstition, if the mother to be is carrying a boy, the ball will burst. If the glutinous balls remain round, then she is carrying a girl. Well, I helped to make the white and yellow balls in the picture below and they don’t appear to have burst after cooking so I guess this superstition holds false for Gavin (unless the doctor saw incorrectly on the ultrasound screen).

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Right from the early days of the pregnancy, hubby and I have received plenty of advice not to purchase any clothes for the baby because we would be inundated with them before the baby is even born. True enough, here are more clothing presents for Gavin from his grandma (my mother) in Melbourne, Aunty M (my cousin), and Aunty PL…

My mother has been keeping herself quite busy with shopping sprees for Gavin. Below are just some of the stuff she has bought. Apparently, there will be more coming from Melbourne, including some toys. My mother appears to have had a lot more faith in the doctor’s early prediction of a boy for it certainly doesn’t look like she was making any contigencies for a girl based on her selection of clothes. Just as well that the good doctor has reconfirmed we have a boy (other wise our little girl would have ended up running around in blue jumpsuits with cars on them).

A jump suit:

A little singlet-top:

Another singlet top with matching pants:

Three more jump suits:

Erm… I forget what these are called, but the one in the middle is from Aunty M.

Some swaddling blankets from Aunty M:

Cute little booties and mittens from Aunty PL:

I’m probably a little bit paranoid after being such a large baby, myself, that some of these clothes look too small to fit my baby. Aside from the reason that hubby and I hadn’t reconfirmed with the doctor that I was carrying a boy, another reason why we’ve delayed buying any clothes is because we weren’t sure how big Gavin would end up being. It’s been said that babies generally follow the birth weight of their mothers (although I don’t know how true this is). Even though Gavin weighed in at 1.7kg during the last check up, I still get paranoid whenever I recall my own baby photos. I was quite a large baby as you can see…

I look at my friends’ newborns and wonder how they can be so small because I was never that small as a newborn…

It looks like our decision not to purchase any clothes for Gavin was a good one, regardless of our reasoning, since it turns out Gavin’s already building up quite a little wardrobe for himself just from the presents he’s been receiving from friends and relatives…

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Yes, I have changed the blog design…

Now that the baby is almost due, Hubby and I often find ourselves wondering into various baby shops selling adorable clothings for babies and toddlers. Whenever he catches me gravitating towards the multitude of gorgeous “little girl” items, he immediately reminds me that our son had better not turn into a “queen”. Just to make sure that he doesn’t, hubby has banned specific designs and colours and labelled them “out of bounds” as far as our little boy is concerned.

One of the “banned” colours happens to be pink and I realised that my baby blog design happens to feature the taboo colour quite a bit so I’ve taken steps to address the colour scheme to something more appropriate for a boy… Now all that remains is a second confirmation from the doctor that we do indeed have a boy as hubby doesn’t want us ending up with the same mistake one couple had. That particular couple had decorated the nursery in preparation for a little girl only to find a little boy in their arms after the delivery.

Frankly, I’m not really fussed about “girl” or “boy” colours since blue happens to be my favourite colour and I would happily use it for my little girl without a second thought.

Regardless, it’s always fun to change designs now and then and this is just an excuse for me to change the look of my blog…

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Twenty-two weeks and counting…

Weight gain since last visit: 2.5kg (still within normal parameters according to the doctor. Average weight gain per month hence forth should be about 2kg/month)

New symptoms developing: some achiness in the lower abdomen (normal signs of the pelvic floor complaining with the added weight to the front)

The blood test I took from the previous came back with great results - haemoglobin count is well within normal range, red cell count was a little low but to be expected since my blood volume is increasing to accommodate baby’s new circulation. HIV, Hep B and rubella were negative, although Hep B and rubella antibodies were still present from previous vaccinations.

The urine test returned negative for urine infections and I had no development of symptoms indicating a current infection. Blood pressure was 110/70.

The detailed scan revealed that baby is growing well and measurements of the cranium and femur are on par with a baby about 22+ weeks old. The sagittal suture is located in the midline and all brain development appears even. Baby’s ear level is high, concurring with our decision not to perform the Triple Test (a low ear level suggests Down’s Syndrome). Lips are well formed with no indication of cleft lip. Spinal curvature looks normal.

Baby has a normal four-chambered heart with no sign of a ventricular septal defect (hole in the heart). A gap communicates between the two atria which usually closes before birth, therefore nothing to be concerned about. We saw the aorta and pulmonary artery rising out of the ventricles and crossing over one another. Two kidneys were present and a well formed placenta without defects. All in all, baby was growing well. Based on these readings, Dr Wong said we were about 80% certain that baby will be born without any chromosomal abnormalities.

We heard baby’s heart beat for the first time. A baby’s heart beat is a lot faster than an adults and hubby marveled at how quickly it was thumping away. We could also see it blinking on the screen like a Christmas tree bulb.

Baby was once again lying face down (which isn’t a good position to get a 4D scan) so I thought we were going to have to wait another month to find out baby’s sex, but while the doctor was taking measurements from the detailed scan, he spotted something between baby’s legs! From the scan, it appears in all likelihood that we have a baby boy although it must be added that determining the sex of the baby from a scan is still not 100% accurate.

Baby also complied by turning to his side partway through the detailed scan so that Dr Wong could take a proper 4D scan for hubby’s and my viewing pleasure. He also copied a few videos for us to add to baby’s first video collection (click here to see video 1, video 2) and a picture to add to baby’s photo album (click here to see the photo).

Baby was moving around a lot during the scan and I could feel some of his movements coinciding with the actions on the screen. Baby was lying in a diagonal fashion with his head on the lower left of my abdomen and bottom facing up towards my right breast. We could see his legs dancing around in a frenzy while his hands adopted the boxer’s pose of covering his face.

Looking at baby’s features on the 4D image, baby looks like he’s got his father’s nose, his paternal grandfather’s ears and his mommy’s forehead. He even gave us a thumb’s up sign during one of the images we recorded.

It was a good trip to the doctor with some very reassuring results. Secretly, I think the hubby is delighted that baby’s a boy, but like my friend C says, no matter whether it’s a boy or a girl, we’d still be happy because it’s our baby.

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A friend forwarded the following to me via email and I’m now thinking very hard whether I really want a boy…

Things you learn when you have sons:

1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 3-year old Boy’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20×20 ft. room.
5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words “uh oh”, it’s already too late.
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10. Certain Lego’s will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year old Boy.
11. Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12. Super glue is forever.
13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.
14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15. VCR’s do not eject “PB & J” sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
20. The fire department inAustin , TX has a 5-minute response time.
21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22. It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

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PL told me that Hamster made a prediction when she was carrying E based on the charts below. Turns out he was right. It seems that if you follow these charts, you can determine the sex of your baby even before the doctors know.

Hamster has apparently done this for others before and it’s worked a treat. Based on his calculation, our little one is a little girl!

Okay, so how do you predict?

You take the age of the woman when she conceived (you need the Chinese age, which is usually about a year older than the regular age we count by) and the month of conception and check the charts below. Based on the wisdom of our ancestrs, word on the street is that these charts have proven to be 99% accurate for thousands of people. Believe it, don’t believe it, well, you can test it out for yourself.

Use the chart below if your Chinese age during conception is: 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31

Use the chart below if your Chinese age during conception is: 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45

EXPLANATION
You can choose for yourself whether you want a boy or a girl by following the chart. The woman’s age from 18 to 45 (Chinese reckoning) is on the top line while the months Jan to Dec indicate the month when the baby is conceived. By following the chart you will be able to tell in advance whether your baby will be a boy or a girl. Thus, you can plan to have a boy or a girl.

This chart has been taken from a Royal tomb near Peking, China. The original copy is kept in the institute of Science of Peking. The accuracy of the chart has been proved by thousands of People and is believed to be 99 percent accurate. By reckoning, you follow a line drawn from the figure representing the woman’s age to a line drawn from the month the baby is conceived.
For instance, if the woman is 27 years old and her baby is conceived in Month 1 (according to the Chinese Lunar Calendar), then her baby will be a girl. The chart is based on the month the baby is conceived and not on the birth of the baby, B-Male, G-Female.

Remarks: A Chinese Scientist discovered and drew this chart which was buried in a Royal tomb about 700 years ago.

But wait, there’s more… If you’re planning your next baby, there are certain things you can do to increase the likelihood of one sex over the other… This was sent to me by a friend so I’m afraid I can’t credit the source of where it came from.

Background:
Man’s sperm consists of X & Y spermatozoa, X spermatozoon decides the female whereas Y is the male. Referring to these physiological properties of the spermatozoa, gynecologists set up the theory of ‘Choice of a girl or a boy’.

1st factor: Food
If you want a baby girl:
Husband must eat more alkaline food, wife eats more acidic food.
If you want a baby boy:
Husband eats more acidic food, wife eats more alkaline food.

Alkaline food: vegetables, fruits, egg white, milk, algae, etc.
Acidic food: meat, seafood, etc.

2nd factor: Timing (When to do it?)
If you want a baby girl:
Frequent copulation during pre-ovulation period.
If you want a baby boy:
Copulating just before ovulation or just after ovulation.

How to confirm ovulation period:
Body temperature increases (you may want to use SPC chart to monitor your body temperature here).

3rd factor: Penetration (How to do it?)
If you want a baby girl:
Husband to avoid deep penetration in the female vagina during copulation.
If you want a baby boy:
Deep penetration by the husband is suggested.

Reasoning:
Characteristics of X & Y spermatozoa
- X: Marathon runner with good stamina
- Y: Sprinter but poor stamina
So, with deep penetration, the chances for Y to reach destination will be higher.

4th factor: Stimulation
If you want a baby girl:
Wife should avoid stimulation during copulation. Secretion from female vagina becomes alkaline when stimulated, therefore this promotes the activity of Y spermatozoon.
If you want a baby boy:
Husband ejaculates after wife has been stimulated.

5th factor: Wife’s Preparation
If you want a baby girl:
Rinse the vagina with solution dissolving 2 spoonfuls of white vinegar in 1 liter of water. Since an acidic condition decreases activity of Y spermatozoon.
If you want a baby boy:
Rinse the vagina with solution dissolving 2 spoonfuls of soda in 1 liter of water.

6th factor: Positioning
If you want a baby girl:
Female to be on the top position & male to be on the bottom position.
If you want a baby boy:
Male to be on the top position & female to be on the bottom position. This posture allows the Y spermatozoon to reach the destination faster.

Happy planning…

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I mentioned during an earlier post that one of the hubby’s friends has a “full proof” theory on determining the sex of the baby. This is the theory:

Friend: So, it is a girl or boy?
Hubby: Dunno yet. Too early to tell…
Friend: Well, is she ugly?
Hubby: Who?
Friend: Your wife!
Hubby: Er… Dunno, why?
Friend: If she’s ugly, then it’s a boy.
Hubby: What makes you say that?
Friend: When my wife was pregnant, she was damn ugly, man!
Hubby: Oh really?
Friend: Yeah… of course! How can a woman still look hot when she’s carrying all those male hormones inside her?

Mind you, this is the theory coming from an engineer…

During a later conversation:

Friend: So… how does she look now?
Hubby: Well, face looks a bit pale, lips are dry and she’s getting pimples on her nose.
Friend: That’s it then. Definitely a boy!

In the chapter “the third month” in “What to Expect When You’re Expecting”, they say that the baby’s sex organs are fairly well developed by this stage. Baby permitting (for it depends on the baby’s positioning on the ultrasound), you might be able to discover the sex of the baby on this month’s ultrasound.

Frankly, I thought it was a bit early, and various other sources quote that it is usually only about 16 weeks onwards before you are able to determine the sex and even then it’s not entirely reliable.

At any rate, we’ll soon find out if Dr Engineer can add another subject to his current study of one.

On the question of boy or girl, assuming one could decide upon the sex of the baby the way we choose the colours of our cars, I had always wanted a boy first so that he could look after his younger sister. Having thought a little more about it, I have decided that perhaps having a girl first might be preferable.

Why the sudden change of heart? Well, considering the fact that it is common for Chinese families to desire a male progeny to carry on the family name (think of China’s little emperor and the number of abandoned baby girls resulting from the one child policy), one can assume that the birth of a boy would always be a momentous occasion regardless of procession.

The birth of the first child, especially in the case where none precede, is also a momentous occasion. Given that I only desire to have only two children (preferably one boy and one girl), to ensure that they each receive the attention due from the rest of the family, I believe that it would be more harmonious if they were to arrive in the order of girl then boy.

Notwithstanding the fact that since I am the mother, I will make it my duty to spread my love between them equally. Although I understand that this is not often a task as simple as we would like it to be, I shall endeavour to make it so.

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