I was just going through my old videos and I found this one…  It was a recording of his first solid meal.  Okay, okay, so it looks like I’m spooning milk to him, but it was really breast milk with rice cereal.

Subsequently, we moved on to sweet potato, which he really enjoyed, although you wouldn’t have been able to tell from this photo, would you?

As the hubby says, it looks like I’m feeding him something really vile.

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This is what I have learned since making the decision to let Gavin attempt to self-feed:

The road to a self-feeding baby is a very messy one but extremely rewarding to observe if you can tolerate the mess.  Allowing Gavin to learn how to feed himself has often left our maid in despair with Mummy wanting to take Gavin out into the garden and hose him down.  Gavin has learned the art of finger painting using rice cereal and he’s enjoyed painting everything from the table to his highchair to his hair, face, ears and nose.

Several nights ago, he allowed me to help him spoon some rice cereal and guide the spoonful into his mouth.  He ate up everything in his bowl and then some!  I was a proud mother.  The experience was shortlived because my independent little munchkin decided he no longer wanted Mummy’s assistance and insisted on doing things by himself.  He managed to get the right end of the spoon into his mouth minus the rice cereal.  Discovering that it was easier using his hands directly, he adopted the Indian style of eating and tasted some finger-licking goodness of out his efforts.

Although he makes an enormous mess at meal times, I have observed a marked improvement in his dexterity when it comes to picking up little bits of food and putting it into his mouth.  Where his success rate used to be about 10% (unless he was holding a teething biscuit or a chunk of bread), he now manages a 50% success rate of getting a raisin-size piece of bread into his mouth.

Allowing Gavin to play with his food has also broadened his sense of adventure when it comes to trying and eating new foods.  Some of the foods he used to reject he now heartily enjoys.  Mealtimes might be a warzone but I guess it is a small price to pay for Gavin’s developing independence.  He also seems happier in his highchair when he has something to do - whether it’s attempting to lick bits of rice cereal off his fingers or paint the highchair with rice cereal.  At least he still allows me to feed him bits of bread when we’re out in public.

These are the 4 benefits I have discovered with a self-feeding baby:

• I get to enjoy my meals more because I’m no longer busy feeding the baby.  I also get to enjoy warm food as opposed to the cold leftovers that are left waiting for me once I’m done feeding baby.
• Baby’s manual dexterity is improving in leaps and bounds.
• Baby is a happier in the highchair and fusses less during mealtimes.
• Baby is more willing to try a variety of foods he previously rejected coming straight from my hand.

Is it worth the mess at the end of the meal?  Yeah, I reckon so…

Below: One of Gavin’s better attempts at self-feeding.

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Looks like the self-feeding is paying off.  Although Gavin hasn’t quite mastered the art of putting the spoon into his mouth to feed, he has discovered that licking his fingers after playing with his food can be quite rewarding.  It also appears he likes what he tastes from his fingers because yesterday morning he willingly ate rice cereal from the spoon.  He took about four mouthfuls before he rejected the rest.  Respectfully, I abided by his wishes and did not attempt to offer him the spoon again.

For the rest of the day, he ate carrot and wholemeal bread which I fed to him in little pieces, while gnawing at his teething biscuits in between.  I’m not too happy with the Holle teething biscuits because I think they break too easily.  Gavin has developed a rather greedy habit of stuffing a large portion of the biscuit into his mouth and gnawing at the center until it breaks in half, leaving him with a mouthful he can’t cope with.  He has already choked a couple of times.  I’m thinking of switching him to Heinz Teething Rusks which I hope will be easier for him to gnaw than Bellamy’s but won’t break as easily as Holle’s.

While we’re on the topic of baby products, I thought I should also add that the Munchkin stay-put bowl that we bought from Singapore isn’t very “stay-put”.  Gavin peels it off so easily we end up having to take it away from him.  Ironically, the divided stay-put bowl we bought from Toys ‘R’ Us for S$5.95 - a fraction of the price of the Munchkin bowl -(shown in the picture below) seems to stick a lot better!  So far Gavin hasn’t succeeded in pulling it off the tray, although he has tried a couple of times.  Ah well, that’s what you get for shopping on the spur of the moment…

But I digress… Gavin’s feeding progress didn’t end with the four mouthfuls of rice cereal.  Last night, after licking a piece of mango from his Ah Kong’s fork, he willingly took several mouthfuls of mango for dessert.  Ah Kong commented that Gavin is a smart boy because he only eats the expensive mangoes.  Indeed, the mangoes were imported R2E2 variants from Australia costing RM16 a pop.  Looks like we have a little mango connoisseur on our hands.

This morning when I tried feeding Gavin rice cereal from the spoon again but he didn’t want it, so I dished it out into his bowl and let him play with it.  During dinner time, I tried again and this time he ate half of what I prepared from the spoon and licked the rest of his fingers!  I guess there’s a lot to be said about respecting baby’s wishes and not trying to force baby to eat, or eat through the methods we Mums deem fit for a baby.

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Yes, I realise that it is starting to seem as though each new food that Gavin accepts is like a mini milestone in itself.  I suppose it is when he is still as fussy as ever when it comes to eating and his anxious Daddy and grandparents are hovering on the sidelines worrying over each fading Michelin ring in that chubby little body of his.

Over the weekend, we discovered that Gavin eats cheese!  I suppose we oughtn’t have been so surprised by this finding given the copious amounts of cheese I was consuming on a daily basis when I was preggars.  On Saturday night we fed him bits of Kraft Cheestiks and he continued opening his mouth for more.  I’m sure this and his healthy consumption of bread will ensure that he maintains his Michelin rings for months to come.

We also tried feeding him some carrot bread from Breadtalk which he seems to like as much as his wholemeal bread.  Looks like there’s hope for the flavoured breads I am planning to make for him.

While we were in Singapore we also bought him a Munchkin stay-put warming dish.  It comes with a suction base that keeps the bowl firmly planted on his tray so now Gavin can start practicing feeding himself. 

I didn’t even realise it, but the Munchkin bowl has a compartment for putting hot water under the food so we can keep Gavin’s food warm while he eats.  Bonus!

As Chiayen commented in my previous post on feeding, it’ll be messy but if that’s the only way he’ll eat, I’m okay with the mess.  I previously tried handing him a spoon with a bit of food on it but all he did was finger the food in the spoon.  Perhaps if I let him have a bowl of the stuff, he’ll eventually tire of experimenting with the puree and start putting the spoon into his mouth.

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At nine and a half months, Gavin appears to have gone on a hunger strike.  We’ve tried everything that he used to like eating and he either seems reluctant to eat them or he flatout refuses to open his mouth.  I’m confused by the sudden change that seems to have come from out of the blue.  It certainly doesn’t help that everyone is doing backflips with anxiety over his stagnating weight gain (even if he still remains in the upper range of the weight and height growth charts).

It is almost as if he fears the spoon or perhaps he fears the contents that the spoon contains?  I find that usually if I am able to get him to taste a little of what is on the spoon, he is more willing to open his mouth if he likes what he’s tasted.  However, beware if he doesn’t because he’ll angrily swipe at every spoon that moves within a half meter radius of his being. 

So far, the only thing that consistently meets with approval is his rice cereal mixed with plain water.  His temperamental tastes for the other foods is so perplexing that at times it’s a little risky to try mixing them into his rice less he rejects his rice as well.  Pumpkin was approved for a few mouthfuls and then rejected.  Broccoli and sweet potatoes that were once met with an eager mouth are now spurned.  Zucchini was approved one morning for breakfast but I haven’t dared to try it again after his favourite foods had been rejected.

We also tried the fruits.  Bananas were received with mixed reactions - one day popular, the next day discarded.  Apples - ditto.  Papaya was also received with mixed reactions, albeit more favourable than the bananas.  He ate a few spoonfuls day before yesterday then decided he had had enough.  Yesterday, he patiently sat in his highchair without complaining and swallowed spoonful after spoonful of papaya until he started to feel full.  Yesterday, he rejected his mango (which he once ate with such gusto).  This morning, he took a few mouthfuls and then pursed his lips shut.

I have read that infants before the age of one year still rely heavily upon breastmilk and formula for most of their nutrients.  At this stage, the introduction of solids are more for taste and to help them get practice eating with a spoon.  About the only additional nutrient that babies require between six to twelve months is iron which comes in fortified rice cereals so I guess we’re quite lucky that Gavin hasn’t rejected rice cereal either.  The other good news is that he still enjoys his breastmilk so we don’t have to worry about him wasting away.

Just to eliminate any possible reasons why he might not be eating, I have tested variables by process of elimination and still not come up with any identifiable patterns.  I’ve tried feeding him in the high chair, on the floor, in the Bumbo chair, on the hubby’s lap, outside - none of it produced predictable results.  Sometimes he’ll eat, sometimes he won’t.  One thing is fairly consistent more often than not is that he refuses to eat, or he eats a few mouthfuls and then balks at the rest, while in the highchair or the Bumbo.  I suspect it is his form of protesting against being restricted when he still wants to explore.  I’ve also tried new foods, more lumpy foods, the same old same old, finger foods - ditto.  Sometimes he’ll eat, sometimes he won’t and there’s no predictable pattern to it either.

A quick check on the parenting forums revealed that this behaviour of Gavin’s is not particularly out of the ordinary.  In fact, there are plenty of parents out there with children refusing to eat.  Some of these parents are experienced with more than one child and they are at a lost because their first child was a compliant eater.  And if I thought I had it bad with Gavin, I’ve read of cases far worse.  At least Gavin still eats rice cereal and he still takes his milk. 

I guess the take home message is that some parents are just blessed with babies who love to eat and others aren’t.  I guess it is sort of like the bathtime example I gave in an earlier post - some babies love water, others don’t.  And just like some hydrophobic babies grow into toddlers that love water, some food-aversed babies can also grow into toddlers that love to eat.  With so many changes going on in their lives, especially during the first few years, we can expect that no habit is necessarily permanent.

Below:  During the early days when Gavin first started solids.  Hubby’s description of this facial expression, “It’s like you’re trying to feed him fecal matter!”  (Note: the original words have been adapted for this family friendly blog).

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We were all eager to see Gavin take his first moutful of solids, so hubby and I went to get some organic carrots from Cold Storage in Great Eastern Mall.  With a brand-spanking new bowls…

…and spoons exactly as recommended - a long handle makes it easier to feed and a plastic coat makes it kinder on baby’s gums…

we couldn’t wait to get started with the solids.  Since Gavin had been eyeing everyone’s food like a vulture hovering over a carcass, I was anticipating his first meal to be a blockbuster hit.  What eventuated was worst than a B-grade flop.  We never even made it to the movies!

Just as “What to Expect The First Year” writes, the first feed does not always go quite the way parents expect it.  Somehow my mind had visualised an gastronomic experience that was a far cry from what actually happened.  I had this mental image of Gavin lapping up every last spoonful of his first bowl of pureed carrots, instead this was what happened…

I diced one third of a carrot and put it into a pot to steam.  Realising that the quantity would be too little for the blender, I figured I would be able to mash it with the back of a fork.  I even expressed a little milk to thin out the mixture.  After ten minutes of mashing, I realised I wasn’t going to get the consistency of the carrots liquid enough for Gavin to eat without potentially choking him.  I ended up throwing out the carrots and feeding Gavin more breastmilk for dinner. 

After dinner, I tried cooking up a larger portion of carrots to put into the blender with a little water like I had read in “Fresh Food for Babies and Toddlers” but the quantity was still too little for our blender.  Maybe it’s time to get a smaller blender…

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Here are a couple of great recipes for a baby on solids from PL:

Rice with potatoes, tomatoes and carrots in anchovy broth

Mushroom, celery and mince chicken porridge

I also bought myself a Woman’s Weekly Cookbook for baby and toddler food so I could get more ideas. I’m probably a tad over eager since Gavin won’t be starting on solids until he’s six months, but I suppose it never hurts to be prepared… There are also some good sample menus in the book “Complete Baby & Child Care” by Dr Miriam Stoppard.

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